Entry tags:
Spy THE Mission - Epilogue
Location: Saison Avenue
<Days later on Saison Avenue, which is being blocked off to be used as a filming site.>
Kuro: “That’s right… I'm the one who killed him.”
“You got me good, Detective. I never would’ve guessed that you'd be able to track me down with 5-year-old evidence.”
“Hurry up and arrest me, then. From the very moment I killed him, I knew there’d be no turning back—”
Keito: ...Hm. Kiryuu's putting on quite the performance.
I made time to visit the shooting location during my break because I was worried for him, but it seems my fears were unfounded.
However, I didn't expect to see you two here as well… Mikejima, Eichi.
Madara: Hahaha. I was his mentor, even if just for a little while — 'course I'd wanna see how my student’s doing. It looks like the independent practise that Eichi-san and I helped with has paid off!
We're both great at hiding our real intentions, so we were perfect for the job, huuuh?
Eichi: This isn't something I should be proud of saying, but we both neglect to demarcate the boundaries between good and bad. That's precisely why he could learn from us.
…But that’s beside the point. I think this victory should be ascribed to the fruits of his efforts as opposed to my competence as a teacher.
Mitsuru: He's soooo~ cool! Kiryuu~senpai feels like a whooole different person after the big reveal!
Adonis: Yes, I'd expect no less from Kiryuu-senpai. The pressure he exerts is comparable to that of a professional actor’s.
Madara: Oho? What're you two doing here?
I heard this drama's one of RhythLink's projects; are you guys gonna act in it too?
Adonis: Kiryuu-senpai asked us to come here. As you said, we're members of RhythLink as well, so we may be given acting roles in the future.
I have almost no experience in that field, so I'll be appearing as an extra today.
Mitsuru: I've been in a buncha dramas lately, so I wanna observe other people!
I like the way Tomo-chan acts, but I'm super duper interested in people who have cooler styles too ♪
Kiryuu~senpai's acting has tons of depth to it, so I'm gonna use it as a reference for the future!
Madara: Oh, yeah? That's right, you two seem so pure — like you don't have a darker side to you.
Yup, yup, studying passionately is a virtue! Mama's reaaaal happy you're learning from this ♪
Keito: Kanzaki was here a while ago, and he said this experience was of use to him as well.
Perhaps this is due to RhythLink's nature, but it seems as though our office has many frank, straightforward idols… With any luck, Kiryuu will be able to inspire them.
Eichi: Yes, his hard work will serve as an example for his juniors to follow. ES, the place where idols can connect organically, is the cradle of advancements just like this one.
On that note… It appears that Kiryuu-kun is doing well, so I'll return to work.
I have to give more thought to ES's new movie project: the sequel to Fist of the Shangri-La Idol.
Keito: Hm, that book you're holding… Could it possibly be my D?
Eichi: That’s right, it’s one of Mizuhanome-sensei’s works ♪
They’re a bit amateur-ish, but the themes explored within his stories are actually quite interesting.
I was thinking of using them as the motif for a new plotline; it would be nice to make a movie based on them.
Keito: ...Eichi. There's something I need to speak to you about.
Eichi: What is it, Keito? You’re on the cusp of having the movie debut of your dreams, so you should look happier. Come on, smile, smile ♪
Keito: Give me one reason to.
Eichi: Ahaha. Stop that, Keito. This is a filming site, you know, and you can't scold me in front of our juniors.
Oh… I’m terribly sorry, but I'm afraid I simply must be on my way.
Keito: Hold it! Don't you dare run away!
You truly are the root of all evil! How dare you play around with my D like that! Come here, I'll personally ensure that you’re never capable of pulling foolish pranks again!
Eichi: Fufu, you’re so scaaary~ But you still have a soft spot for me, don't you? ♪
I’m going to live my life and work towards my goal with all my strength, regardless of the impediments that may hinder me. If any opposing forces, no matter how fearsome, should try to stand in my way, I’ll overcome them all.
Come, Keito! Right now, you’re the only one who’s capable of stopping me…♪
Keito: Agh, I must be the unluckiest person in the world to have a childhood friend like you!
They say ill weeds grow apace… At this rate, he'll live for a century yet…!
Entry tags:
Spy THE Mission - Chapter 7
Location: RythLink Office
Eichi: Hold on just a moment, I don’t understand this. Kiryuu-kun killed someone? But that’s impossible…
Keito: Kiryuu, you explained that too poorly — now Eichi and Anzu are confused.
The truth is, we both had a hand in the creation of this plan.
Kuro: ‘Course, it ain't like I actually killed someone.
Tenshouin. You know that RhythLink has been funnelin’ their resources into dramas and movies and stuff, don’t cha?
Eichi: Hm? Yes, I’m aware that RhythLink’s idols are more on the traditional side. They’ve promoted those old forms of media for years and years now.
Could this possibly be an attempt at method acting?
Kuro: Haha, I’d expect nothin’ less from you. You sure are quick on the uptake.
You’re right, I’m playin’ the role of a murderer on a late night drama right now.
A youngster who used to be a delinquent gets caught up in an issue from his past… Then he gets his hands dirty, but he needs to hide the truth.
I tried too hard to get into character; apparently, I was glarin’ the whole time. If I kept that up, it’d be too obvious that I was the culprit, right?
I’ve accepted the job already, so I can’t go and ruin the audience’s fun.
That’s why I tried to get used to the feeling of bein’ a criminal by workin’ with you and lyin’ through my teeth all day.
Keito: After all, you think about the most devilish things with a pleasant smile on your face, Eichi. If I made you team up with Kiryuu, I thought he might learn that skill as well.
I’d be able to reprimand you for stealing my doujinshi, and Kiryuu would find the experience useful for his acting. It was two birds with one stone.
Eichi: Hm... Was Mikejima-kun in on this too?
Kuro: Yeah, Mikejima was happy to lend me a hand.
Lies and truths, pretense and presence — you and Mikejima have got all that stuff down pat. I’m a straightforward guy, so I figured there was a lot I could learn from you.
Eichi: I see. He’s awful, too… Thanks to him, I spent the entire day getting toyed around with.
Hmm? Is it that amusing to see me get led around by the nose like this, Anzu-chan?
Oh, that’s true. Now that you mention it, this is similar to the ploy I executed during the filming of Fist of the Shangri-La idol. I suppose I got my comeuppance.
Keito: Did you just realize this?
I erred from the very start. When Kiryuu approached me, I shouldn’t have proposed to use this plan as a way to teach you a lesson.
Eichi: On the contrary, I was only able to realize that I got my just desserts because I was put into this situation.
If we were playing the Werewolf game that's been ever so popular in the dorms, nothing of the sort would have happened. You didn't err in the slightest.
I do have confidence in the sharpness of my instincts, but I certainly can't constantly be suspicious of the people around me — my nerves would get far too frayed.
And, above all, today is Eichi Day. My heart is in a state of tranquility.
As a result, I had this realization rather late. You delivered a splendid performance, Kiryuu-kun.
Kuro: Thanks, Tenshouin. I managed to fool a guy like you, so I feel a lil' more confident now.
Eichi: Fufu, then do give me a demonstration. I’m already in this neck-deep; I'd feel rather lonely if I, an essential part of the plan, were the only one left out of the loop.
Keito: How dare you talk high and mighty about camaraderie after taking my doujinshi! I should have given you more of a scolding—
Eichi: Ahaha. Aren't you aware that both your enemies and allies are co-actors standing on the same stage as you?
Keito: You're absolutely shameless… You really do need to reflect more!
Kuro: Calm down a lil', Hasumi no Danna. I dunno the full story, but it looks like today's an important holiday for Tenshouin — Eichi Day or somethin'.
Let's just call it even.
Keito: Hmph. As per Kiryuu's request, I'll let you off this time… but I won't be so lenient in the future.
More importantly, you must have learnt something from observing Eichi up close. You should try acting like a man with ulterior motives again.
Kuro: You're right; I'll give my lines another shot.
Ah~ Ahem, ahem. (Clears his throat.)
"What didja say!? He got murdered!?”
“You're right, I was close with him — keyword was. That was 5 years ago now.”
“We’ve long since drifted apart. Detective, you said you were here to investigate. Do you really think I'm a suspect?"
Keito: You're still glaring. Are you going to be okay, Kiryuu?
Eichi: …Ahaha. Well, it certainly isn't that easy.
But that's simply another aspect of life. There's no panacea to all our problems; hard work and effort are valuable precisely because we can't achieve great feats without struggle.
I'm cheering you on. Best of luck at the recording.
Kuro: Yeah, I plan on doin' whatever I can.
I dragged a lotta people into my mess. I needa make this into a show so great I can say everythin' that happened today wasn't a waste.
Entry tags:
Spy THE Mission - Chapter 6
Location: RythLink Office
Keito: Phew, the meeting went off without a hitch. I have one less thing to worry about, at least.
Keito: Phew, the meeting went off without a hitch. I have one less thing to worry about, at least.
However, I didn’t expect that you’d be attending as well, Anzu.
I was worried that some sort of disagreement would break out between you and the RythLink higher ups.
Cease that at once. Doe eyes will not work on me. Good grief, you were in a veritable maelstrom of strife.
As the central figure of the P Association, you’re in a unique position. And that makes you the antithesis of RhythLink’s “hammer down the nails that stick up” policy.
It appears that you were even involved with the recently-executed Fist of the Shangri-La Idol project — I wouldn’t have been surprised if a war had broken out during the meeting.
…No, there’s no need for you to apologize to me. It isn’t as if you did anything wrong. Just as the principles of Christianity and Buddhism differ, so do those of individuals’.
But I must caution you against thoughtlessly placing faith in others. I need to warn you so you don’t do anything foolish, like walk headfirst into the traps of those who seek to sully your good name.
…Hm? Why was I unusually focused on my phone during the meeting, you ask?
It was nothing, merely a trifling matter — it was just about my doujinshi.
You’re looking forward to my new publication?! No, that isn’t what this is about!
Don’t look at me with those sparkling eyes of yours! I do not plan on releasing a new volume!
…Good grief. That’s right, you’re a fan of my works, aren’t you? I was being too brash.
It might be alright for me to disclose the details to you. However, we’re here in this empty office alone; this is quite the unfavorable situation. When the timing is right, I’ll tell you the whole story.
Come now, it isn’t anything grave. I simply noticed that Eichi has been borrowing and reading my doujinshi night after night…
So I wanted to teach him a lesson somehow.
Eichi: You’ve revealed your true colors, hm, Keito?
Or should I call you… Mister K?
Keito: …Eichi. Why are you here?
Kuro: I came with him, Hasumi no Danna.
Keito: There’s nothing I can do if you overheard me. I was being too hasty.
Yes, you’re right; I’m Mister K.
Eichi: I wasn’t completely sure, but it appears that my suspicions were quite founded.
I won’t take your D— your doujinshi anymore if you don’t want me to, but I do wonder why you chose to execute such a large-scaled operation.
Keito: Hmph. If I hadn’t done all this, I doubt you would’ve ever reflected on your actions. Ill weeds grow apace.
Eichi: What a cruel way to put it. I can’t deny your statement, though…♪
Keito: You’ve learnt your lesson the hard way now, right? I even went through all the trouble of asking Mikejima to be your opponent. To put it frankly, this was all a waste of time.
Eichi: Do you really think so? It’s fun to do these sorts of things every once in a while, so I have no complaints at all.
Keito: Eichi.
Eichi: Ahaha. Sorry, sorry~ Nothing good will come out of angering you further, hm?
You have every right to be mad. I’ll find a different way to relieve my stress next time, I promise.
Kuro: Haha, he hasn’t reflected at all ♪
Keito: Eichi’s always like this. Good grief, he’s absolutely incorrigible.
Kuro: The case is finally closed now, huh? Good job.
Eichi: You too, Kiryuu-kun.
Oh, that’s right. We’ve finished our work, so why don’t we all have lunch together? I’ll take you to a lovely restaurant ♪
Keito: Hey, wait a second! I’ve only just eaten lunch, you know!?
Eichi: Come now, there’s no need to hold back. It’s Eichi Day today, after all… ♪
Keito: That’s your tradition, isn’t it…!?
Kuro: C’mon, don’t give him the cold shoulder. He’ll probably be considerate and take us somewhere we can have a light meal or somethin’.
Keito: If it were anyone but Eichi, I’m sure they would. Knowing him, though, he’ll likely take us to a lavish buffet. [1]
Eichi: Ahaha. Even I wouldn’t go that far, you know ♪
I’ll make sure to bring you to a place that serves light meals, so consider this an apology for taking your D as well… ‘kay?
Keito: No going back on your word, is that clear?
Eichi: But of course. I only mess with you out of love, you know.
You’re my one and only childhood friend. I’d never do anything bad to you… ♪
(...Now that I’ve gotten to the bottom of this, it was a rather normal incident.)
(This was all just a battle Keito instigated because he wanted to rile me up… He came up with a plan to reprimand me for my ungentlemanly actions, starting a strange war by proxy.)
(But something still isn’t quite right. I feel uneasy, almost as if I’ve eaten something strange — is this hunch of mine unfounded, I wonder?)
(Would Keito really plot such an elaborate plan? Despite how straightforward, how independent he is?)
Please wait just a moment. There’s one last thing I’d like to confirm.
Keito: Hm?
Eichi: The K in Mister K might not stand for Keito after all.
Keito: What are you on about, Eichi? I told you that Mister K is my pseudonym.
Eichi: …You did, but now that I think of it, something was off from the very start. I didn’t know what was going on, so I simply followed the directions given to me as though I were a mere doll—
It felt like I was in a spy movie; I couldn’t see the full picture at all.
But suppose this war by proxy was incited for a different purpose…
That there was meaning to this odd combination of Kiryuu-kun and I.
I can barely believe this myself, but… Kiryuu-kun, aren’t you the true Mister K?
Kuro: ……
Looks like you saw right through me.
You’re real sharp. Yeah, I’m the one behind all this.
Eichi: So I was right. But why on earth did you come up with such a roundabout plan? Won’t you explain yourself to me?
Kuro: How do I put this? Hmm… No, this is no use. I ain’t good at explainin' things.
Listen. The thing is, I killed someone.
Eichi: What…?
Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
Translation notes:
1. Keito’s talking about a specific type of Chinese buffet here known as a “Three Day Feast” — you can take a look at what a crazy amount of food there is here: https://www.afpbb.com/articles/-/3233081Spy THE Mission - Chapter 5
Warning: Mention of broken bones, torture.
<10 minutes later.>
Eichi: Mister K…?
Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
Location: Starmony Dorm Courtyard
<10 minutes later.>
Madara: ♪ ~ ♪ ~
Fufufu. I’ve gotta admit, they almost had me with that pincer operation back there. I was on the edge of my seaaat!
They sure underestimated me, though. There’s no way Eichi-san could’ve won in that kinda situation.
Even if he had to push his body to the limits, he should’ve been the one chasing after me; he should’ve made Kuro-san try to catch me.
If that was how they chose to do it, they could’ve safely retrieved the D — Kuro-san could’ve broken my wrists or something when we faced off. Well, this is all just hypothetical, though.
Eichi-san’s got his physical condition to think about. If he devoted his energy to minor issues like this, he’d be getting his priorities all wrong.
But still, it would’ve been a flawless plan. Eichi-san doesn’t have much stamina, so he’s only got a single chance to push himself. This was the perfect opportunity, but he blew it.
They let a huge catch get away. And now they’ve gotta put even more energy into their second strategy.
…Well? How do you plan on catching me, I wonder?
Eichi: You make a good point. Our pincer operation has proven to be ineffective, so we’ll simply have to face you head-on.
Kuro: In the end, we’re usin’ our muscles more than our brains.
Madara: Hmm. You’ve both stepped out in front of me — does this mean you don’t have any other cards up your sleeve?
Are you sure you don’t wanna come at me without a surprise attack? I have to say, this seems a lot sloppier than the ambush you came up with earlier.
Eichi: We’re quite sure, thank you. Allow me to explain why.
Here, feast your eyes on this: it’s a completely normal water gun. I’m going to use it to capture you.
Madara: …A water gun?
EIchi: Fufu, it’s quite simple.
I decided that I’d rather completely drench both you and the D than allow its existence to be known. And if I do so, you’ll lose all your grounds of negotiation.
Madara: …Are you for real? This D’s supposed to be one of a kind. I’m pretty sure you’re the one who’s gonna be in trouble if you ruin it.
Eichi: Ahaha. That would still be better than the secret getting out.
Bang!
Madara: Woah!? D-Don’t get aheaaad of yourself! If you do that—
Waaaaah!?
Guh… That didn’t come from Kuro-san’s direction! Who the heck shot me?
Kuro: Haha. You may be fast, but even you don’t stand a chance if we come at you from all sides.
Madara: All sides…?
Mitsuru: That’s no fair! Don’t hog all the fun, senpai! You’ve gotta invite me if you’re playing a game, ‘kay~?
Adonis: Fufu. Tenshouin-senpai, you’re a member of Sports Survivors just like us. If you plan on doing something fun, please allow Tenma and I to join.
Eichi: Of course, you two are a great help. In this game, you win if you shoot Mikejima-kun with these water guns. It’s gotten rather lively now that you’ve joined us ♪
Madara: I see what’s going on here… You called for backup in order to catch me, didn’t you—!
Kuro: You bet. Thanks to that, I’ve gotten soaked too, but there’s no gettin’ away now.
Madara: Urgh…!
Kuro: Take that! It’s the end of the road for you.
Madara: I surrender, I surrender!
Hahaha. I didn’t expect you to come after both me and the D. Color me impressed...
But how’d you know it was fake?
Eichi: Well, you see, I had my doubts from the moment you threw the D down the stairs.
When I fought over it with you, it felt as though something was off. That’s when I began thinking things over.
Keito made the D quite a long time ago, and yet the book you showed us was in suspiciously good condition.
Considering how old it is, it’d simply be impossible for the paper to have remained in its original mint condition, regardless of how well it was preserved.
And I doubt that you’re the type of person who’d throw away his sole bargaining chip so recklessly.
Additionally, Anzu-chan is one of Mizuhanome-sensei’s fans. That’s all the more reason you wouldn’t do anything to it: you wouldn’t want to ruin her trust in you.
In other words, this was all a staged kidnapping — nothing more than a ruse of a larceny.
The truth is… You had a hidden mission and disguised another book as the D to achieve it, didn’t you?
Madara: Hahaha! You’ve got the eyes of a hawk, huh, Eichi-san?
You’ve read me like a book. Alright then, I’ll spill the beans.
Kuro: Damn right you will. Mikejima, why the hell’d you pull this stunt?
Now that I think of it, I’ve got no idea what your motive could be. And I’m pretty pissed I got dragged around the whole day today.
Madara: Soooorry to burst your bubble, but I’ve got no idea what the real mission is, either.
Eichi: What on earth does that mean…?
Madara: A secret someone requested I do this, y’see. They told me that, for certain reasons, I should take this book and try to strike a deal with you, Eichi-san.
Kuro: “A secret someone”…? I’m tellin’ ya to spit it out already.
Madara: Hahaha. I’ve got my own sense of pride and duty, yanno? If someone tells me to not ‘fess up, I’m not gonna, no matter what kinda torture I get put through.
Considering it’s you, Eichi-san, I might get a taste of the worst kinds of pain, but that doesn't faze me.
Eichi: Just what kind of person do you take me for?
I won’t resort to violence because of an issue as trifling as this.
Still… As an idol, there’s almost nothing you could gain from doing this. Are you sure you didn’t want to relieve some stress? That’s the only feasible motive I can think of.
Won’t you tell us the truth, Mikejima-kun?
Madara: ……
The person who asked me to pull off this staged heist is someone by the name of Mister K.
Eichi: Mister K…?
Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
Entry tags:
Spy THE Mission - Chapter 4
Location: Seisou Hall Common Room
Madara: Ooooi, Eichi-san! Kuro-san! Is our game of tag over already?
At this rate, my big, grand scheme is gonna go to waste!
I stole your friend’s precious D, so I thought you’d come at me more fiercely…
Maybe I should’ve gone all out and taken the guy himself hostage! That’d probably light a fire under you, huh?
Kuro: …Tch. Look at him, actin’ like he hasn’t even broken a sweat. If he keeps sprintin’ around nonstop in the gardens and the rooms like this, we won’t stand a chance.
Eichi: It appears that our opponent is quite the formidable one.
I expected that you’d be able to put up a good fight, but Mikejima-kun is the captain of the track-and-field team. It’d be impossible for us to win against him in a game of tag.
All we can do is try to use our knowledge and numbers against him.
It’s me, you, and Keito, who’s watching over us from above. If we put our heads together, we’d be a match for even Manjushri. [1]
Kuro: Oi, don’t kill Hasumi off like that.
Eichi: It’s quite alright; I can make death jokes if — and only if — they involve Keito.
Besides, I was on the brink of death myself just a short while ago… ♪
Kuro: There you go again, callin’ ‘em “death jokes.”
Well, whatever. We aren’t gonna get anywhere just standin’ around and shootin’ the breeze like this. Hurry up and tell me what you’re thinkin’, would ya? You’ve gotta have some kinda clever idea, right?
Eichi: But of course. That being said, my plan isn't fully fleshed out, and even I have to admit that it’s rather trite.
You’re very agile, so I’d like you to chase after Mikejima-kun, leading him towards the place where I’ll be waiting in ambush. There, we’ll perform a pincer attack.
Kuro: Gotcha. A pincer attack, huh?
Luckily for us, Mikejima’s gotten real far away — it’s the perfect time to split up. I’ll lead him to the ambush site and grill him good.
Eichi: Wonderful. First things first, we have to decide where to guide him…
Location: Seisou Hall 2nd Floor Passage
<A while later.>
Madara: Hmmm? Looks like I’ve lost sight of ‘em again.
If the people who’re “it” don’t put in more effort, the person running away’s gonna get reaaaal bored! What a pickle, what a pickle!
But I’ve been preeeetty curious… about what this D or whatever is actually about.
Maybe I should take a quick peek? I’m pretty sure Anzu-san’s a fan too, so I might be able to gain some new insight.
Alrighty, then… Oho?
Kuro: Finally found ya, Mikejima.
Madara: Ooh. You came in the nick of time, Kuro-san! I was about to read each and every page of this D!
Looks like you came alone — is Eichi-san resting ‘cause he got all tuckered out from running around?
Is he okaaay? I’d be a tiiiny bit worried if he had to get hospitalized again.
Kuro: Then you can rest easy. He’s just takin’ a lil’ break so he can cook up our next plan of action.
He told us to go play tag by ourselves for a while to kill time.
Madara: Hoho, that’s good to hear!
Alright, then — show me what you’re made of! I wonder if you’ve got what it takes to catch me, Kuro-saaan?
Kuro: I let my guard down earlier, but you’re not gettin’ away this time.
Come at me! If you think you can get away, you’d better put your money where your mouth is!
Madara: Ooh! How scaaaary!
(Here I go! There’ll be a flight of stairs around this corner here. Once Kuro-san’s in the blindspot, I’ll get away with a sprint.)
Kuro: (...That’s probably what he’s thinkin’, but he’s fallin’ right into our trap.)
(He’s not gonna run straight; he’ll take the stairs, and that’ll put some distance between us. But Tenshouin’s waitin’ right behind that corner. He’s gonna snatch the D away the moment Mikejima arrives.)
Madara: (I’ll slow down a lil’ at this turn — mmgh?)
Eichi: Take that!
Madara: Nuoh. Were you here the whole time, Eichi-san!?
Uh oh! Looks like you managed to grab onto the corners of the D.
That’s not good enough, though!
Eichi: (It’s futile. At this rate, Keito’s D is going to tear; I have no choice but to let go.)
Madara: Fufu. Woooonderful! Seems like you’ve given up!
Eichi: What a shame — we were so close to victory. In terms of physical strength, it truly is impossible for me to win against you.
However, I shan’t allow myself to quietly give up and let you have the D. No, this is far from over.
Madara: That so? I hope you know the same trick won’t work on me twice. Do you have any other ideas, I wonder?
Eichi: Fufu, I certainly wouldn’t tell you if I did. I'd hardly be worthy of the name Tenshouin Eichi if I didn’t have some sort of trick up my sleeve, though; I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a backup plan or two.
Madara: Ooh, lemme give you a rooound of applause! You just wouldn’t be Eichi-san if you didn’t, huh ♪
I hope you show me your next plan sometime soon.
…Oh?
Kuro: I won’t let cha forget about me, Mikejima!
Madara: Woah, you almost slipped my mind! Good job sneaking up on me, Kuro-san!
Did you plan on catching me while I was chatting with Eichi-san? Sucks to be you, though — I’m taking my leave here!
Whoopsy daisy… ♪
Kuro: He threw the D down the stairs?!
Eichi: That isn’t all, Kiryuu-kun. Mikejima-kun threw himself down the stairs as well.
Kuro: He’s freakin’ insane. He jumped over the railing all the way down to the first floor, and now he’s gone.
Dammit. I feel like I’m playin’ against a little kid. He’s slippery as an eel, dodgin’ us like that.
Anyways, what’re we gonna do next? You said you’ve got a couple of backup plans, right? D’you think any of ‘em can help us get back the D?
Eichi: “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a backup plan or two,” huh.
That was quite the outrageous bluff, if I do say so myself. I have nothing of the sort prepared, you see.
Kuro: Haaah? The hell? Do you really not have any other ideas?
Eichi: There’s no need to fret; I have confidence in my abilities to plot and scheme. It should be easier for me to come up with more ideas now that I have a blank canvas in front of me.
Let me ask you something before I start pondering our strategy, though... Did you notice something odd about the D?
Kuro: Somethin’ odd?
Eichi: Yes. I felt as though something wasn’t quite right when I glanced at it earlier. I wonder why that is?
Kuro: That doesn’t really help… It doesn’t matter whether or not somethin’ was off about it — we’ve gotta do somethin’ about Mikejima.
I ain’t really jumpin’ for joy at the thought of this, but I’ll follow whatever plan you come up with.
Eichi: You’re a great help, Kiryuu-kun.
…Ah.
Perhaps I can use the strange feeling I had earlier as the basis for my next plan.
Kuro: …You sure 'bout that?
Eichi: Yup. It’s an all-or-nothing sort of gamble, but I’d like you to assist me.
The second phase of the D Recovery Plan begins… Now.
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Translation notes:
1. Manjushri is a bodhisattva that is known to be the embodiment of transcendent wisdom.
Entry tags:
Spy THE Mission - Chapter 3
Location: Dormitory Library
<Noon, in the library.>
Kuro: …It’s almost time, huh.
Eichi: It would be oddly considerate of them to arrive at noon exactly.
They stole Keito’s douji— “D” and even went through all the trouble of leaving a note. I doubt that they're of sound mind, so their punctuality would serve as a rather interesting dissonance in character.
Wouldn't you agree, Kiryuu-kun?
Kuro: You’re askin’ me? Nah, I haven't really thought about it. But doin’ flashy things for no reason is one of your specialities, ain’t it?
Maybe they're tryin’ to use your own modus operandi against you, Tenshouin — I wouldn’t put it past ‘em.
Eichi: Hm... Keito mentioned something along those lines as well. Have I truly done such terrible things?
I’m quite sure the leaders of the world have been significantly crueler, but…
Kuro: In the first place, I’d say it’s kinda weird to go around sayin’ stuff like, “My crimes aren’t as bad as everyone else’s.”
Eichi: I suppose so. Though I can’t help but feel that you’re all too pure to live in this world of ours.
Madara: Oooh? This sounds like an interesting conversation! What’re you discussing, Eichi-san, Kuro-san?
Just taking a stab at it, but… Could you pooossibly be talking 'bout this doujinshi?
Eichi: That cover… There’s no mistaking it, that’s Keito’s. Could I have you return that D to me?
Madara: “D”?
Kuro: It’s a secret code we came up with. We’d stir up some real trouble for Hasumi no Danna if we talked ‘bout this in the open.
Madara: Hm, should I play along with you, then? Maaaybe not. I’m tryna expose this, so I guess I should call it by its actual name—
Eichi: Quite frankly, I couldn’t care less. I’d rather you simply tell us the reason why you’re doing all this, Mikejima-kun. Why did you steal his D?
Madara: You sure are a barrel of laughs! If I told you the reason without putting up a bit of a fight, there’d be no point to me leaving a letter and stuff, right?
Well, I’m tryna make sure this doesn’t blow up, too. We don’t get this kinda chance too often, so how ‘bout you take a guess, Eichi-san?
Eichi: Hmm. Considering the fact that you’re the culprit, I can only suspect that you did this to revel in the joy of tormenting me.
Madara: Oho. Unfortunately for you, that’s the wrong answer!
Eichi: In that case… Could this possibly be a prank targeted at Keito?
Madara: Hahaha! My answer’s pretty much the same!
Kuro: Oi. I’m not gonna let you and Tenshouin get all worked up on your own. Stop wastin’ time and tell us your terms, Mikejima.
Madara: Whoopsy daisy. I really do talk in circles too often.
I’ll get straight to the point, then! To put it simply, I accepted a personal request from a certain someone.
An anonymous client who identified themselves as one of Mizuhanome-sensei’s fans came in yesterday evening, y’see?
And it looks like this person wants Mizuhanome-sensei to write a new work.
Eichi: A new work…?
Madara: Yup. Previews of his past works have been put on a buncha posters in Yumenosaki for a while now, right? So it looks like this mysterious person saw those and decided that they wanted him to make more no matter what.
But as I was investigating, I discovered that Mizuhanome-sensei’s been absolutely swamped with work; he hardly has the time to draw something new.
That’s just how Keito-san is, huh? He always ends up prioritizing the people around him more than himself. At this rate, my client’s gonna end up waiting till the end of eternity.
And that’s when it hit me! If I take this D and show it off to everyone — if I make Mizuhanome-sensei more well known — he might feel more duty-bound to create some new stuff!
Eichi: Do wait a moment, that’s far too hasty of a judgment.
If people could simply produce art whenever they were told to, they would never struggle. But that isn’t what producing doujinshi is like.
I’m quite sure Keito said something along those lines in the past once, but anyways… Is there a reason why you’re going to such lengths to expose Mizuhanome-sensei’s identity?
Kuro: I was wonderin’ the same thing. I don’t think you’re a bad guy, but you're not gonna get away scott free if you cause trouble for Hasumi no Danna.
There’s gotta be a reason why he’s hidin’ his identity.
Madara: Fufu. If you want me to confess, why don’t we have a showdown?
Eichi: A showdown…?
Madara: Yup. If I manage to keep the D in my possession till the end of the day, I win. And if you two manage to take it away from me, I’ll let this whole issue with Mizuhanome-sensei float away — water under the bridge.
How ‘bout that? Sometimes I wanna try getting chased instead of doing all the chasing, so why don’t we have ourselves a fun lil’ game of tag?
Kuro: Hah, I was wonderin’ what you’d suggest. You’re really having the time of your life, ain’t cha?
Madara: Hahaha! If you don’t manage to take the D away from me somehow, you won’t be able to protect his secret, yanno?
Eichi: That’s true. There’s a sliver of reason in what Mikejima-kun is saying.
And if I wasn't capable of sinking to the level of an outlaw like you, I’d be a disgrace of a president. As the person who holds full authority over StarPro, I’ll accept your challenge.
Kuro: Oi. Don’t go addin’ weird layers of meaning to this.
Well, whatever. I guess I don’t have the right to refuse… Let’s take care of this real quick.
Come at me! I’ve blocked off your escape route — even you won't be able to get away, considerin’ the position you're in now.
Madara: Oooh. I’d expect no less from you, Kuro-san. Your movements are as agile as always!
It was a smart decision to chase me into a corner — a dead end — like this. Your knowledge of martial arts really isn’t just for show, huh ♪
But don’t cha know I’m not the type to quiver in fear after seeing a lil’ display like that?
Here we go, “Jump of Eight Ships!” Take that! [1]
Eichi: He’s gone…!
Madara: Hahaha. Jumping off a wall’s a cakewalk for me.
Now watch this: I’m gonna escape through this very windoooow! If you don’t catch me soon, I might just expose the existence of this D to eeeveryone in Starmony Dorm!
Kuro: Tch, I didn’t think the bastard would jump outta the window like that. His physical abilities are definitely nothin’ to sniff at.
We gotta chase after him, Tenshouin. If he makes a mess outta everything, all of Hasumi no Danna’s hard work’ll go to waste.
Mikejima’s a real menace, but we should be able to corner him if we work together. Let’s make a temporary alliance.
Eichi: But of course, Kiryuu-kun.
After all, I’m the only one who’s allowed to play around with Keito.
Kuro: …Geez, how do I put this? It kinda feels like I’ve joined the wrong side.
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Translation notes:
1. Madara’s referencing the story of Yoshitsune, who allegedly jumped over eight ships in the Genji-Heishi war. He plays Yoshitsune in Wisterias, his debut story.Entry tags:
Spy THE Mission - Chapter 2
Warning: Mentions of beheading, strangulation.
Location: Dormitory Library
<The following day.>
Eichi: ...I can’t find it.
How odd — I'm quite sure I left it here last night. Could someone have taken it…?
Keito: SO IT WAS YOU, EICHIIIIIIIIIIIIII!?
Eichi: Keito? What on earth happened for you to be so boisterous this early in the morning...?
Keito: Don't you “what on earth happened” meeee! What exactly is the meaning of this letter?!
Eichi: Letter…?
Let's see, “I've taken your doujinshi. If you want it back, come to the book room at noon”...?
…?
Keito: Don't you dare play dumb with me! Swear on the Buddha's name that you'll tell me the truth and explain yourself!
You bastard, you took my doujin— my “D” without permission, didn't you? You stole my D because you wanted to play around and see how I'd react, didn't you?!
You're absolutely incorrigible! As your childhood friend, I’ve overlooked all the trouble you’ve caused up until now, but you've tested my patience far too many times!
Sit down, Eichi! I'll behead you right here, right now...!
Kuro: Oi, oi. Calm down a lil', Hasumi no Danna. You look like Acala or some kinda demon or somethin'. Did Kanzaki's spirit come and possess ya? [1]
Eichi: Keito. That’s a facial expression an idol should never make. Look, Kiryuu-kun’s rather taken aback as well. Let’s discuss this more calmly, shall we?
Keito: I need you to take this seriously, Eichi! Having others see my D would be a fate worse than death…!
You’re going straight to Kuronawa hell! But don’t worry — I’ll still chant sutras for you! Although I doubt that they'll even be effective! [2]
Eichi: Didn’t I just say that we should discuss this calmly…? Now, what exactly is that letter?
Keito: What...? Do you really not know, Eichi?
I assumed that you were trying to pull another prank on me by leaving that letter in my room.
You’re certainly the only person I can think of who would do something like this.
Eichi: This is all a misunderstanding. It is true that I’ve borrowed and read your D in this book room countless times.
However, that was simply because I wanted to read it myself, not because I wanted to show it off to others.
Keito: Oi. Don’t confess your sins so nonchalantly.
…Well, I suppose this is better than hiding it. You planned on returning the D to my room afterwards, didn’t you?
Eichi: But of course. It wouldn’t be interesting at all to show it to other people. I simply hide it in the book room temporarily; I always retrieve it the next morning.
And then I calculate when you’ll leave your room and return it to your shelf when you aren't present.
But even so, you were far too careless, Keito. You desperately didn't wish for others to see them, and yet you chose to hide your D in a place as easily noticeable as your bookshelf.
Keito: Tch… I had no other choice.
We all have roommates now, and actively trying to hide the D would only have raised unnecessary suspicion. That’s why I decided to take a risk and simply leave it on my shelf.
Kuro: I don’t get why you’d have to hide your D or whatever in the first place. You made it yourself, right? Why don’t cha just show it off to people?
Keito: That D is my treasure. You wouldn’t like it either if someone stole away your sister and exhibited her to the whole world, would you? This is a similar situation.
Kuro: Ah, gotcha. I’m not really okay with you puttin’ her on the same level, but… I get what you’re tryna say.
Basically, Tenshouin did somethin’ kinda like tellin’ the whole world ‘bout your secret lovechild, huh? And that’s why you asked for my help so early in the morning, Danna.
Eichi: Ahaha! “Secret lovechild”! That's certainly an apt comparison.
Keito: Oi. Don’t say “lovechild” — you’re going to stir up unwanted misunderstandings.
Kuro: C’mon, it’s just an example. Don’t take it too seriously.
I don’t really get the situation now, though. If Tenshouin wasn’t the one who left that letter, how’d it get into your room?
Eichi: You’re in the wrong for getting mad at me, you know. Couldn’t you at least apologize a little?
Keito: Absolutely not. I assumed it was you because you enjoy making fools out of people. You need to reflect on this.
In any case, the letter had already been left by my pillow by the time I woke up. It would be utterly unimaginable for anyone other than Eichi to have done this.
Eichi: …Actually, this might be Mikejima-kun’s doing.
Keito: Is there a reason why you think so?
Eichi: Yes, I met him in the book room yesterday night. He noticed me hurriedly trying to hide the D; he may be using it to play a trick on us.
Keito: It’s certainly possible that Mikejima did this. He's never been particularly fond of you.
Eichi: However, it truly is quite perplexing. Why on earth would Mikejima-kun endanger himself in such a way?
It seems to be all loss, no gain — or perhaps I should say that there was no need for him to stick his nose into this at all.
Kuro: Maybe he just hates you so much, he couldn't take it anymore?
I dunno the details, but back during MDM, you worked so hard to increase Alkaloid's popularity you wound up in the hospital.
Eichi: And you believe that’s similar to the deeds I’ve committed in the past?
…I don’t quite think you’ve hit the nail on the head yet. Everything I did was simply part of my strategy to help ES survive and become a rising force in the industry.
I wanted to assert the fact that, in such a situation, idols like Alkaloid are what we need.
Additionally, Mikejima-kun himself once collaborated with Alkaloid.
If he wanted to denounce me, there surely would have been other ways to do so. I doubt that his motive would be so simple.
…At any rate, we certainly won’t get anywhere by merely making conjectures about his feelings.
Above all, communication with the culprit is needed. The letter says, “Come to the book room at noon”... Say, why don’t you let me handle this matter?
I am the one who started this mess, and luckily, today happens to be Eichi Day.
Additionally, because I’ve only just gotten out of the hospital, I have quite a few breaks scheduled in — I can certainly be more generous with my time than Keito can.
Keito: No. I’m absolutely sure that nothing good will come out of leaving this to you. There’s simply no other option than to take care of it myself.
I need to attend a lunch meeting with the RhythLink executives later today, but I won’t be able to eat my food in peace unless this matter concerning my D is settled.
Kuro: C’mon, I’ve been tellin’ you to calm down a little. You’ve gotta prioritize the meetin’ and stuff, Hasumi no Danna.
Eichi: Hmm, so you’re choosing to side with RhythLink? You’re leaving me all alone?
Keito: What are you, a child? I don’t report to you.
Additionally, it’s a bit complicated, position-wise. It appears that the RhythLink higher ups who have been keeping an eye on your ES movie enterprise plan are consulting each other about giving one of the agency’s younger idols a significant promotion in a drama or movie.
RhythLink has been a rather well-established name in the movie and music industries for a while now; they’re currently stuck in something of a dilemma, ruminating over whether they should pick an agency veteran or a fresh face.
Eichi: Ah, are you referring to Fist of the Shangri-La Idol? I attended the advance screening that was held, and it appears that the movie immediately received good reviews. The prospect of a new project is already on the table.
Keito: Good grief. You weren’t directly involved this time, but you're still leading me around by the nose — you always have been. I thought I’d be free from all this politicking after I left the Student Council but, on the contrary, I’ve been inundated with it.
Eichi: Ahaha. How very like you ♪ No matter where you go, you simply can’t escape your fate of always helping others.
Keito: You’re the last person I want to hear that from.
Kuro: Anyways, you go and prioritize all of that stuff, Hasumi no Danna.
I’ll handle this D thing for you. If you weren't around, Akatsuki probably wouldn't have been able to keep up with the other bigshots in RhythLink — there's so many of 'em, after all.
So if Akatsuki’s general is in a pinch ‘cause of his personal affairs, there’s no way I could leave him alone.
Keito: Forgive me. I’m causing trouble for you, Kiryuu.
If my idiotic childhood friend does anything strange, feel more than free to punch him in the gut. If the situation calls for it, you can even strangle him.
Kuro: Haha. I don’t really wanna be a murderer at this age.
Sure, I got into a lotta fights back when I was a lil’ rascal of a kid… But I think I’ve grown outta doing stuff like hurting people for my own convenience.
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Translation notes:
1. Acala, protector of the Dharma, is an important figure particularly in Japanese Buddhism. He’s known for his expression of “extreme wrath.”
2. There are 8 major levels of hell in Japanese Buddhism; Kuronawa hell is for thieves, amongst other offenders.
Entry tags:
Spy THE Mission - Chapter 1
Location: Dormitory Library
<September, late at night in the Starmony Dorm.>
Eichi: ♪ ~ ♪ ~
Ahh, I can’t stop my heart from racing. Why is it that, contrary to what one would expect, humans long to do something the more they’re told not to?
The more you tell us we mustn’t, the more we long to play such exciting games.
That’s why I’m going to read Keito’s doujinshi as a bedtime story again tonight… ☆
Fufu, it’s the absolute best way to relieve stress. His stories dispel all the tiredness I’ve accumulated, allowing me to have a most pleasant sleep.
Keito— no, Mizuhanome-sensei’s works bestow courage and hope upon me. They truly do save me ♪
(...Hm, what was that noise?)
(I need to hide the doujinshi on this bookshelf. If Keito saw me with it, I wouldn’t put it past him to instantly murder me in cold blood.)
(I went through all the trouble of borrowing it from his room, so it’s a shame… But I suppose there’s no need for me to worry if I hide them within the ranks of such a voluminous mass of books. Now, then, I should be alright regardless of who’s approaching.)
Madara: …Oyaaa? If it ain’t Eichi-san. What’re you doing in a place like this?
Eichi: Mikejima-kun. I believe that’s my line.
I’m quite surprised. The noise I heard was so unusually loud, I assumed it was anyone other than you…
What brings you to the book room in the middle of the night? I doubt you’re having trouble falling asleep like I am.
Madara: You’re a barrel of laughs, Eichi-san! Do you really think I’m constantly a bundle of energy?
There are nights when I can’t fall asleep either, and times when I’m too tired to conceal my presence.
Plus, I’ve been pushing myself a little too much lately ‘cause of the special job I got.
My body’s real tuckered out, but my head’s still wide awake; I figured I’d try to read a book or something before bed so I could stabilize the balance between my mind and body a lil’ more.
Eichi: I see, there are times when you feel tired as well.
Both physical and mental strength is necessary for sleeping soundly. That may be why your overly dramatic way of speaking could be considered to be a unity of mind and body.
One needs to be healthy in order to recover their physical energy… Good grief, these things called human bodies have far too many limitations.
I’ve come to understand how the first Emperor of Qin, who sought immortality, must have felt. [1]
Madara: Hoho. Then do I have the perfect cure for you ♪ It’s called cinnabar; it’s made outta mercury, and it’s known as a miraculous medicine that’ll make you immortal—
Eichi: That’s the poison that caused the Emperor’s death, isn’t it. Do you intend to kill me?
Madara: Hahaha. Well, ain’t it common for evil leaders to die of poison?
You’re real smart! That’s right, you’re an eintellectual, so I was just making a joke catered to your taste ♪ [2]
Eichi: Fufufu, what an interesting joke ♪
You don’t appear to be laughing in the slightest, though.
Madara: Actually, I wanna know why you’re laughing. Considering our location and proximity, you’re well within my range, yanno?
I don’t really like being violent, but ever since the ES plan was put into effect, you’ve been regaining power...
So I just wanted to give you a lil’ warning, Eichi-san.
Eichi: I appreciate your concern. However, I’m not so wet behind the ears as to be shocked by your words.
In the first place, Mikejima-kun, you’d surely gain nothing from harming me here.
Madara: Oh, yeah?
Eichi: The reason why is simple. To begin with, I’ve been been in very poor health; I was hospitalized due to overwork until just recently—
If you did something to me, you’d cause trouble for Double Face, which has only just been established.
Mikejima-kun. It’s certainly true that your existence is a threat to me.
I can only arm myself with social power and status, so extraordinary individuals such as yourself are my natural enemy. You’re more than capable of calculating when I’ll be alone and offing me right then and there.
Isn’t that why Saegusa-kun supports Double Face so fervently, he’d even lend Oukawa-kun to you?
He may posture as a strategist leading a battalion, but ultimately, he’s only in control of a ragtag gang of mercenaries.
If we had a war of attrition, I — with my superior monetary assets — would surely emerge the victor. Saegusa-kun is aware of that, which is why he won't challenge me to a battle.
Madara: If you’re right, that makes me something like a secret weapon to Ibara-san, huh?
It’s just like rock paper scissors. Eichi-san, you win against Ibara-san, and I win against you. That’s why Ibara-san wanted me to join him so desperately… I guess.
Eichi: Yes, that’s the current situation. However, the reason why you’re so terrifying is because you’re an individual hoarding such a vast amount of power.
You’re threatening when alone, but your prowess is halved when you gain a partner. Humans become weaker when they’re given things to be responsible for—
If you caused some type of harm upon me, you would surely embroil Oukawa-kun in trouble as well.
Madara: Hahaha! Yeah, I’m sure you’re right, Eichi-san.
Go ahead and keep on letting your guard down, juuust like that. Kohaku-san… he’s real sneaky in his own way, so there’s no need for me to hold back on his account. If you don’t watch out, we might catch you in our trap.
We could punish you: a villain who’s hiding something he doesn’t want other people to see.
Eichi: …So you noticed.
Madara: Your gaze told me everything I needed to know.
Eichi: Fufu. How very troublesome. At this rate, I truly might fall into your trap.
…Thanks to you, it seems I’ll be having another restless night ♪
Keito has surely returned to his room by now, so I’ll return it by tomorrow morning. Is that alright with you?
Madara: Yep. You’ve gotta reflect on this, Eichi-san.
News travels fast. If I hear that you’re going around hurting people again, I’m not gonna sit by idly and twiddle my thumbs.
Eichi: Fufu. You really are quite frightening. Are you being serious or merely joking, I wonder…?
On that note, Mikejima-kun, I give you my regards for the next time we meet.
Madara: Yup. Well, then. I hope that when we meet next, it’s as idols.
Next Chapter
Translation notes:
1. Qin Shi Huang, who founded the Qin dynasty, was the first emperor of a unified China. He is believed to have died from ingesting mercury pills made by his alchemists and physicians who believed they would grant him immortality. Interestingly, he created the title of emperor.
2. Madara uses a word for “smart” that’s read as “eichi.”