haranami

Madara: ♪ ~ ♪ ~

Fufufu. I’ve gotta admit, they almost had me with that pincer operation back there. I was on the edge of my seaaat!

They sure underestimated me, though. There’s no way Eichi-san could’ve won in that kinda situation.

Even if he had to push his body to the limits, he should’ve been the one chasing after me; he should’ve made Kuro-san try to catch me.

If that was how they chose to do it, they could’ve safely retrieved the D — Kuro-san could’ve broken my wrists or something when we faced off. Well, this is all just hypothetical, though.

Eichi-san’s got his physical condition to think about. If he devoted his energy to minor issues like this, he’d be getting his priorities all wrong. 

But still, it would’ve been a flawless plan. Eichi-san doesn’t have much stamina, so he’s only got a single chance to push himself. This was the perfect opportunity, but he blew it. 

They let a huge catch get away. And now they’ve gotta put even more energy into their second strategy.

…Well? How do you plan on catching me, I wonder?

Eichi: You make a good point. Our pincer operation has proven to be ineffective, so we’ll simply have to face you head-on.

Kuro: In the end, we’re usin’ our muscles more than our brains.

Madara: Hmm. You’ve both stepped out in front of me — does this mean you don’t have any other cards up your sleeve?

Are you sure you don’t wanna come at me without a surprise attack? I have to say, this seems a lot sloppier than the ambush you came up with earlier.

Eichi: We’re quite sure, thank you. Allow me to explain why.

Here, feast your eyes on this: it’s a completely normal water gun. I’m going to use it to capture you.

Madara: …A water gun?

EIchi: Fufu, it’s quite simple.

I decided that I’d rather completely drench both you and the D than allow its existence to be known. And if I do so, you’ll lose all your grounds of negotiation.

Madara: …Are you for real? This D’s supposed to be one of a kind. I’m pretty sure you’re the one who’s gonna be in trouble if you ruin it.

Eichi: Ahaha. That would still be better than the secret getting out.

Bang!

Madara: Woah!? D-Don’t get aheaaad of yourself! If you do that— 

Waaaaah!? 

Guh… That didn’t come from Kuro-san’s direction! Who the heck shot me?

Kuro: Haha. You may be fast, but even you don’t stand a chance if we come at you from all sides.

Madara: All sides…?

Mitsuru: That’s no fair! Don’t hog all the fun, senpai! You’ve gotta invite me if you’re playing a game, ‘kay~?

Adonis: Fufu. Tenshouin-senpai, you’re a member of Sports Survivors just like us. If you plan on doing something fun, please allow Tenma and I to join.

Eichi: Of course, you two are a great help. In this game, you win if you shoot Mikejima-kun with these water guns. It’s gotten rather lively now that you’ve joined us ♪ 

Madara: I see what’s going on here… You called for backup in order to catch me, didn’t you—!

Kuro: You bet. Thanks to that, I’ve gotten soaked too, but there’s no gettin’ away now. 

Madara: Urgh…!

Kuro: Take that! It’s the end of the road for you.

Madara: I surrender, I surrender!

Hahaha. I didn’t expect you to come after both me and the D. Color me impressed...

But how’d you know it was fake?

Eichi: Well, you see, I had my doubts from the moment you threw the D down the stairs.

When I fought over it with you, it felt as though something was off. That’s when I began thinking things over.

Keito made the D quite a long time ago, and yet the book you showed us was in suspiciously good condition.

Considering how old it is, it’d simply be impossible for the paper to have remained in its original mint condition, regardless of how well it was preserved.

And I doubt that you’re the type of person who’d throw away his sole bargaining chip so recklessly.

Additionally, Anzu-chan is one of Mizuhanome-sensei’s fans. That’s all the more reason you wouldn’t do anything to it: you wouldn’t want to ruin her trust in you.

In other words, this was all a staged kidnapping — nothing more than a ruse of a larceny.

The truth is… You had a hidden mission and disguised another book as the D to achieve it, didn’t you?

Madara: Hahaha! You’ve got the eyes of a hawk, huh, Eichi-san?

You’ve read me like a book. Alright then, I’ll spill the beans.

Kuro: Damn right you will. Mikejima, why the hell’d you pull this stunt?

Now that I think of it, I’ve got no idea what your motive could be. And I’m pretty pissed I got dragged around the whole day today.

Madara: Soooorry to burst your bubble, but I’ve got no idea what the real mission is, either.

Eichi: What on earth does that mean…?

Madara: A secret someone requested I do this, y’see. They told me that, for certain reasons, I should take this book and try to strike a deal with you, Eichi-san.

Kuro: “A secret someone”…? I’m tellin’ ya to spit it out already. 

Madara: Hahaha. I’ve got my own sense of pride and duty, yanno? If someone tells me to not ‘fess up, I’m not gonna, no matter what kinda torture I get put through.

Considering it’s you, Eichi-san, I might get a taste of the worst kinds of pain, but that doesn't faze me.

Eichi: Just what kind of person do you take me for?

I won’t resort to violence because of an issue as trifling as this.

Still… As an idol, there’s almost nothing you could gain from doing this. Are you sure you didn’t want to relieve some stress? That’s the only feasible motive I can think of.

Won’t you tell us the truth, Mikejima-kun?

Madara: ……

The person who asked me to pull off this staged heist is someone by the name of Mister K.